Day 6, My First Attempt

The next post will be my first attempt at writing, if you have the time please read through it and let me know what you think about it, honesty please.

I want writing to become a big part of my life’s reading has. So I need to start sharing, I need to start getting pieces written and out there for all to see.

The first piece I have written how my life has changed over the last 7 years and how I have I have become the person I am today. A pretty positive one.

A little heads up on what I am living with health wise these days. I have allergies to eggs, fowl and peanuts. I live with anxiety, depression, Asthma, Type 2 Diabetes, Osteoporosis (spinal damage), undiagnosed MS (Spinal cord liaison), Neuropathy, Tested positive for Sarcoidosis (in remisson) and to top it all off Fibromyalgia.

Choices

Something that was said to me on Friday got stuck in my head and it niggled away in the back of my mind over the weekend.

Then I saw a film yesterday that struck a chord with me and with the comment that was made on Friday. The film was called “Choices”. Now I wouldn’t normally watch a love story, but the wife and eldest were watching it on the tv.

At this point I would just like to say that these types of film are not my guilty pleasure.

Anyway, the film had a very strong message, not just about the love between two people but also about choices. It doesn’t  matter how big or how small the choices we make are, because for us as people they can both be life altering.

This morning I started reading a new book, it is helping me think about why I have made the decision to make the changes I want and need in my now.  The book I am reading is called:

Get your sh*t together

How to stop worrying about what you should do

so you can finish what you need to do

and start doing what you want to do

By Sarah Knight

Though this book has a serious message, it is explained with a lot of humour and a lot of swearing, which I find refreshing and easy to grasp, because of that I know this will help me with the process planning the next steps in a way that makes sense to me.

It seems that these occurrences  over the last 4 days are probably the universe telling me to get of my ar*e and get on with it.

I know it is something I am passionate about and I know that is what I want to do, I have many questions to research to find the answers I need and I also to get some advice from people I completely trust.

Watch this space

Go well

Gary x

Birthday #57

So Friday was my birthday I’m now 57 yrs old. I don’t feel that old mentally, I still feel as daft as I was when I was in my early 20’s, but physically things have not gone so well I feel about 107.

The day started off pretty well, a few cards and presents from the family, a few books that I wanted, a bit of lindt dark chocolate, a tee shirt and tickets to go and see Harry Potter World when I’m feeling a little more up to it.

After everyone had gone off to work, Dora decided she wanted to go on one of her rare walks, damn near killed us both, but still enjoyed it as it’s not that often we get to do one now.

Then after getting home it was time to get ready as I was going out to lunch, meeting my work mates at Pizza Express, good food, great company, good laughs and excellent presents, cinema vouchers and a bottle of local “Silly Moo” cider. Been so long since the 4 of us were in the same place together.

Friday evening was spent eating popcorn and watching another present I got from my eldest, a DVD called “Bad times at the El Royale” excellent movie, by the time I got to bed I could barely move, but after having such a wonderful day I really didn’t mind though as Saturday and Sunday had been earmarked as rest days.

Saturday was spent mainly in the garden with Dora sleeping beside the bench and me reading the latest book I’d bought “Made in Scotland” by Billy Connolly, and watching a fantastic FA Cup Final between Man City and Watford and the best part of Saturday was I didn’t have to watch  Eurovision, result!, pain levels were ridiculously high but a good day in all.

Sunday got off to a painful start, eventually got downstairs the Mrs went off to work and I went into the garden with a coffee, Dora and my book, should hopefully finish the book today.

So the wife is home now from work and my youngest is on her way. Tonight is Takeaway night as it was my birthday Friday  and so I will be partaking of a Lamb Vindaloo, Pilau rice and a garlic naan.

All in all a damn good weekend

Thank’s everyone for the cards, presents, company and birthday wishes you all made the weekend a good one.

Party on dudes

Gary  x

Endgame

Spoiler alert ” there are no spoilers in this post”

After resting for 2.5 days, I went for a coffee at the Cafe in the Park in my nearset town. I got there around 2:30pm and sat outside the Cafe drinking a very nice coffee, the sun was shining and I started to read my book “East of Croydon”, I then put on my  headphones listening to The Stranglers greatest hits, every now again I would look up  from my book and there would be a squirrel rumaging for food or a robin sitting in a Branch singing. Perfection, best medicine in the world.

So 3 o’clock arrived and so did my smiling boss, unfortunately that was the moment the sun decided to go in. So we moved inside to the Cafes conservatory to drink our coffee and talk about my health, football and the forthcoming meeting with our  HR rep, about how and when my being released from my job on medical grounds will be decided. Now I am very sad about what is going to happen, as I love my job and the people I work with. There is no bad feeling on either side and I really hope my health is going to  allow me to volunteer in the office.

Endgame

To say I was excited about what I was to do next would be an understatement, I was about to tick off another item from my bucket list. A trip to the Cinema to see Avengers Infinity war : Endgame. Luckily it wasn’t  going to be a packed cinema due to it being an afternoon showing on a schoolday and I managed to get an aisle seat Row G. Everything was set perfectly, the advertisments finished, the trailers began, the anticipation was rising.

Then just as the film was about to start two late comers arrived, they started walking up the aisle. Now the seats are quite small and there isn’t much leg room, hence the need for the aisle seat,damn they were sitting in my row so I would have to get up, so before I was fully standing they pushed passed whilst muttering “sorry” as I dropped back into the seat.

The film stareted everyone went quiet then I heard tose words you dread in the Cinema “scuse me”, it had only been 10 minutes, again never quite got to my feet before he pushed past, back I dropped, then repeat sequence 5 minutes later whe he got back from the loo.

Relax , deep breath, back to watching the movie, 30 minutes later repeat the sequence but it was his mate this time, one of the things that I really had a problem with was the absolute stench of smoke and beer

Relax, deep breath get back towatching the movie again. 20 minutes pass and I start to her a really strange annoying  noise, after about 10 minutes I realised that guy nearest me had fallen asleep and was snoring, this went on for about an hour  when he suddenly woke up and stared to pee into his empty drinks bottle, I relised they were getting up again so as fast fast as I could( which is close to watching somebody move in slow motion) I tried to stand up and get out of the way, no chance they caught my left leg as they ran past, so I fell back over the arm of the seat, landed with my backside on the seat and my legs and stick still sticking over the arm and out into the aisle, before I had sorted myself out they’d legged it through the door and were gone never to return, carried out a quick pee check to make sure I hdn’t been splashed in  all the confusion. then……..

Relax, deep breath and an extra strong mint this time, then settled down to watch the rest of the film. Wow the film lived up to all my expectations and more, I would reccomend it to everyone whether you are a mavel fan or not.

So all in all another blooming good day.

In the words of  Police Seargant Phil Esterhauss from the tv show  Hill Street Blues

“Let’s be careful out there”

all the best, Gary

Ps When I said the sun went in when my boss arrived, I wasn’t inferring that she was the cause of it going in. I needed to may that clear. She’s a little ray of sunshine really 🙂

 

 

 

Opioid Days

Day 4

Okay another very bad nights sleep with pain being the main culprit keeping me awake

Trying new meds is a bit like “De ja vu”  I’m only on a low dose but only getting a slight benefit pain management which is good, but on the other hand the side effects I’m getting are not good. This has been the same pattern for each pain meds I have been tried on for the last 8 years.

Side effects    

  1. The widespread itching has gotten worse.
  2. Feeling a little high most of the time.
  3. Concentration is still bad.
  4. Forgetfulness is still bad.
  5. Oh yeah forgetfulness is still bad.
  6. Short term memory is rubbish.
  7. What was I doing?
  8. Where am I?
  9. What day is it?
  10. Why am I here?
  11. What time is it? I don’t know how many times a  day I ask these 5 questions but I can tell it’s a lot.
  12. Neck and lower back pain are still bad.
  13. Pain when breathing is still the same.
  14. Still getting the occasional hand tremors.
  15. Balance is still poor as is co-ordination.
  16. Still dropping and braking things.
  17. Still tripping and falling quite a bit.
  18. Have having absences since I started the new meds.
  19. Spacial awareness not good.
  20. A major improvement on Saturday West Ham won 4-3.
  21. Brighton won today after playing for about 3 hrs at Millwall, so the boss will be happy.
  22. Haven’t broken any crockery for 2-3 days that’s a bonus.
  23. Happy St Patrick’s day.
  24. Enjoying sitting in my shed tonight writing my blog looking at my favourite pictures hanging on the walls
  25. Last but not least my memory is still crap.

Tomorrow I’m going to work on my memory album and also write down of all the countries, cities and American states where I have either worked or visited.

One last thing I would like to recommend a book that I read recently. It’s called “Why are you pretending to be normal” by Dr Phil Friend OBE and David Rees. It about how disabled people see their own disabilities and how able-bodied people see our disabilties. It asks a really interesting question about near  the end of the book. “Are you disabled by other people’s perceptions of you or by your own perception of you?”

Thanks for taking the time to read my ramblings and remember be kind to yourself and to others.

Take care,

Lists, My Favourite…………….?

Sitting up late, can’t sleep yet as I’m in so much pain, so to try to take my mind off things I have decided to write different lists of my favourite things.

So I’ve started off with 25 of my favourite films in no particular order, many of which are about overcoming adversity

1) Man on Fire
2) Gran Torino
3) I Daniel Blake
4) Avengers Assemble
5) Gone in 60 Seconds
6) Field of Dreams
7) 300
8) Unstoppable
9) The Warriors
10) Shooter
11) Unbreakable
12) The Sixth Sense
13) The Losers
14) 42 The Jackie Robinson story
15) A Few Good Men
16) Coach Carter
17) Deadpool
18) Patch Adams
19) Watchmen
20) Money Ball
21) Invincible
22) Heaven Can Wait (original version)
23) Remember The Titans
24) Bi-centennial  Man
25) Logan

 

My Favourite Meals in no particular order are.

1) Boston Clam Chowder with Sourdough bread.
2) Lamb Vindaloo with Pilau rice and a garlic naan bread.
3) New Mexico Hatch green chilli stew.
4) jalapeno poppers.
5) Sizzling steak fajitas.
6) Blackened Catfish with dirty rice.
7) Tom Yum Soup (Thai).
8) Bacon & Cabbage (Ireland)
9) Barbecued  Garlic Langostines (Singapore).
10) Thin & Crispy jalapeno & Pepperoni Pizza.
11) Irish Stew
12) Texas style barbecue  beef ribs.
13) Toasted Bacon sandwich made with Sourdough bread.
14) Garlic & Chilli Pasta (Rome)
15) Beans on Toast.
16) Mushroom soup
17) Fruit salad
18) Chilli con Carne.
19) Bruschetta with garlic, tomato, Olive oil, Balsamic vinegar and parmesan cheese.
20) Fish & Chips

Bugger, well that’s helped me take my mind off my pain a bit, but now I can’t stop thinking about bloody food.

Hope you all have a great weekend.